The office Christmas party is a kind of temporal torture reserved only for Britain. That strange place in December – sometime between 4pm on a Friday and when your workplace designates as “the start of the party” – where there’s insufficient time to get from the office to somewhere suitably festive without either accepting your launch into Christmas-party seasonuality wearing your work clothes or changing into your exact work clothes. The French change; Americans go home.
The Brits power through on sockeye salmon sandwiches from the deli and “being resourceful” with items confiscated from hotel rooms as kids. I learned this lesson years ago at my very first real-deal grown-up magazine job. It was one of those communications sent at around November, blissfully oblivious time: Christmas drinks!
6–late! Immediately following work on December 15th!
Immediately following work.
Satan was taking notes for that line. I strolled into the office Christmas party in khakis and a blazer that December and didn’t think twice about it. Until I looked around and realised that my colleagues had individually located an extra ten yards of party-appropriate fabric with which to adorn their entire bodies, plus optional headgear.
I stuck out like a.marketeer-giving-a-speech. Among drunken trills of Jingle Bells, Patrick, the then-editor, spotted me bobbing hopelessly at the periphery of the crowd and took pity. “Didn’t you hear about the Christmas drinks?” he said, flashing his Rudolph earrings. “I thought you were coming as dad dances!” I tried to explain that this was, in fact, what I was wearing to the Christmas drinks. He offered to phone home and ask if there was any ammunition I could snort.
I’m pretty sure he still feels guilty about it. Fast-forward two decades and numerous office Christmas parties later, and I’ve since developed a… knack for this sort of thing. It helps that I now have children that require manual labour-intensive costumes for half the year.
If you can pull a Goldilocks costume out of your work bag, you can make-work clothes-party clothes with the best of them. Let’s start at the beginning, though – with what to wear to work that day. Obviously, everything you’re going to wear to the Christmas party needs to already be entirely appropriate for your 2pm meeting with the CEO.
This does limit your options somewhat. Traditionally, men have shunned “getting dressed” as an activity, and planning ahead has never really been our forte. But fear not, gentle reader, for we are about to make accessories out of dark trouser fabric and magically wrinkle-free shirts.
First up, trousers. Now, unless you work in a genuinely creative environment where denim shorts are the norm come December, you’ll want to adhere to some sort of baseline formality with your bottoms. Jeans are too casual for some offices, suit trousers too much of a commitment for the party.
You want a middle ground: something tailored, but made of a vaguely interesting fabric. A touch of stretch is never a bad idea, either. I vote for wool trousers, in charcoal, navy, or for a bit of bravery, a deep burgundy.
Perry Ellis, Nan Kohler, or Isaktail all do great ones around the £90–120 mark; if you’re feeling extravagant, Officine Générale makes stunning ones that fit like a dream (and cost about double). The key is to go for a slightly taller rise than your everyday trousers; trust me on this. You’re going to spend all day sat at a desk and then fill yourself with carbs and booze.
You’ll want to accommodate. Moving on to tops. Start with a button-up shirt.
Again, unless you’re an employee at Vice, basic white or blue won’t cut it here. You want a shirt that says “Christmas party” when removed from your workaday proceedings, but doesn’t outright scream “DISCO!” when you first put it on. Look for small cheques, slim stripes, or interesting textures – think oxford cotton or chambray.
Bonus points for jewel tones here; deep green, browns, burgundy, and yes, even purple can read well in an office environment but look party-ready come 7pm. Layer your outfit-winning shirt under a basic jumper or cardigan to mute the effects. Again, neutral colours here – stick to greys, navys, or camel.
The point of this mesh cardigan straightjacket is to take the edge off your awesome shirt and maintain professionalism during daylight hours. Seven pm rolls around. The printers churn out their first vat of flat wine.
Time toParty. Flip that jumper back inside-out, reveals your badass shirt, and – BAM! – you’ve officially gone from slacking-off-at-work to rocking-out-at-your-office-party without changing a thing. But we can go one step further.
See those mysterious depths of your desk drawer or work bag? Hideaway a fancy belt (not the one you’re wearing all day, I hope) and pop it on over your dress trousers. It doesn’t have to be superexpensive but something with a bit more texture than your standard brown or black leather belt.
You Might Also Like
I’m fond of woven leather myself (I picked this one up from Anderson’s and forever regret spending so much money on a belt) but maybe you’re into patent or olive? Do you, boo. If you can swing it footwear-wise, another quick change for the party portion of your workday involves shoes.
Okay, so this is verging into pan-European husband territory at this point, but hear me out. Keeping a pair of leather Derby shoes at work is easily justified; even if you’re a loafer/trainer kind of guy, you can slip these bad boys under your desk come party o’clock and magicalshoe(transform)intoPartyShoe(tm). Go for something in a burnished brown rather than black if you can.
A nice pair of Chelsea boots are also great for this; they’ll work for both office and party, but feel a little less “nine-to-five” once the sun goes down. Lastly – and this is something far too many British men neglect – a spritz of cologne. The stuff you smother yourself in at 7am will have long since vanished by party time.
Keep a small atomizer of something a little lighter/smellier/flashier than your day-time cologne at work and spritz liberally before the party begins. I’m a fan of Tom Ford’s Oud Wood or Penhaligon’s Halfeti for this – sophisticated but with enough nuance that you don’t smell like every other clone-shirt at the office Christmas party. Now for the hard part.
Jackets. You spend your morning commuting to work wearing something sufficiently warm to survive the harshest of British winters. By party time, you’ve stripped down to the barest of necessities thanks to office heating and alcohol.
Yet you’re still expected to walk home without dying of hypothermia. The obvious solution here is to wear a jacket that complements both your work and party attire. Find a unstructured wool overcoat in black or navy – something that looks work-appropriate but won’t look overly formal if you end up ordering one too many champagne cocktails at 1am.
Bonus points if it can roll up into a jacket shape come party time, but realistically any coat that isn’t your North Face山大会议外套 or MILO dive jacket will work fine. Alternatively, for those of you who really want to level up your office-to-party game, let me introduce you to the art of the bag drop. Some call it checking their coat; Jamie (of our awesome family menswear trio) calls it revolutionary.
The idea is to find a secure location to store your winter coat WELL BEFORE the party starts; be that a colleague’s car, a friend’s desk with an actual lockable drawer (hi Jamie), or – in Jamie’s case – him paying the bellhop at his local hotel to look after his coat for him. “It’s totally worth the extra £10 fee for the concierge” he always says “rather than hovering over your coat all night, or worse – losing it”. Socks, gloves, hats; these are all inherently Christmas, am I right? Novelty reindeer jumpers might be acceptable winter wear in an office context (though they definitely aren’t at AW), but for the love of God stay away from flashing ties.
Unless you’re head office, someone’s going to comment on your terrible fashion choices. That said, there are definitely worse ways to lean into the Christmas spirit than a pair of Christmas socks, right? Especially if they’re mostly concealed by your trousers.
Santa hats are also acceptable but only after 9pm, or your second cocktail. Before that, and you run the risk of being ostracised by your grown-up colleagues. My go-to move for getting away with festive-specific menswear at the office Christmas party is texture.
Opt for traditional winter colours – deep greens, blues, reds/burgundies – and channel those Christmas feelings through fabrics and textures instead of tinsel-like shirts. Velvet, corduroy, and thicker wools are your friends here. Last but not least – we come to the pièce de résistance; Christmas clients events.
You know the ones. Stupidly formal invites that still demand you come straight from the office, only marginally less awkward than actual office parties but with more toddlers trying to grab your glasses off your face. Welcome to the big leagues, gentleman.
These are the Make Work Clothes Look Like Party Clothes events where the literal stakes are your career. But fear not; with the proper arsenal at your disposal, you’ll be party-ready before your boss has finished telling that same tired joke about how great Snapchat is for brands.
To wit: my cardinal rule for office-to-party work functions, especially ones with clients in attendance, is what I like to call “business plus.” Essentially your best office attire with two key upgrades.
If you wear a tie to work, bring a funner one to change into before the event starts, and hide in your office bathroom until it’s go time. Bonus points if it glints slightly under the low-light Instagram photos your co-workers will be taking all night. If you don’t wear a tie, swap your wristwatch for something nicer; or throw on a pair of classic cufflinks if you roll with French cuff shirts.
It sounds antithetical to this whole concept, sure, but trust me – these tiny details let people know you made an effort without actually changing your outfit. Kind of like removing your jumper but way, WAY more subtle. And if all else fails?
Throw on a Christmas jumper. Believe me, I’m as reluctant as the next Englishman to legitimise Christmas jumpers. But hear me out.
Just… make sure it doesn’t have actual LED lights in it. We can’t all be Tom Daley.
