Mike, my neighbour and fellow dad-texter-extraordinaire, sent me a text last week asking for some shopping advice. Around 10 PM he texts me a picture of two polo shirts. One was from Target ($15), the other was from Banana Republic ($65). “Patrick, explain to me why I should spend the extra fifty dollars on clothes that my three- year-old is going to rip his boogers on.” Mate, he makes a great point.
I’ve found myself trapped in this very dilemma countless times over the years. Ever since becoming a parent I’ve realised that most clothing purchases are made based on two questions. 1) “How badly will this stain?” and 2) “Can I wash this with the kids’ grass-stained football jerseys?” I used to think that more expensive meant better.
I bought a $120 work shirt because it was made of “high-quality cotton that will change your life on Zoom meetings.” Sophie wore it once. Face lotion across the front. Life-changing shirt became murder scene conspiracy plot hole.
Kids will teach you how to invest in clothing.
Quick lesson I learned along the way is that there is a happiness-curvesque trend that happens with price vs. quality. Yes, more money will typically get you something that’s made better.
But it only goes so far. At some point, you’re just paying for a brand name, advertising costs, or the ability to walk into a room and say “I didn’t just shop at Target.” Kids and clothes just don’t mix well when it comes to that premium price. I’ve been on both extremes of this scenario.
I once had a closet full of cheap clothes that would autumn apart after a season. Then I went the complete opposite direction and started only buying expensive clothes that my children would tear to shreds. I’ve finally found a happy medium these days by understanding when it pays to spend more money and when you should just accept the fate that your shirt has a short life expectancy when you have kids.
Allow me to share with you what I’ve learned about when it’s worth spending the extra dough on clothes and when you should save your pennies for more important things…..(like coffee). Invest in The Building Blocks These are your staple items. You know, the things that every other piece in your closet is based off of.
Shoes are a big one for me. I went through about six pairs of affordable dress shoes in two years because the material would start tearing after three months. I finally caved and bought an actual nice pair of leather shoes that I can get resoled when they get worn down.
Sure they were more expensive, but I won’t have to buy new shoes every six months because the fake leather starts chipping off. Winter coats are another staple that I always recommend spending money on. You wear them year round, they need to actually keep you warm while you’re standing around listening to your kid run football drills, and a good winter coat will last you for years as appose to just one season.
I bought Jackson and I coats when he started kindergarten (8 years ago) that are still going strong today. They’ve been to the playground countless times, gone camping several weekends, and once even served as a blanket for a birthday party we attended in February (don’t judge, it was freezing). Save on Things That Will Get Destroyed White t-shirts?
Cotton candy blend. They’re going to get stained or stretched out or used as bibs eventually anyways. Same thing with athletic clothes.
They’re meant to get sweaty and disgusting so I’m unwilling to spend big money on clothes that I know are going to smell like a gym locker. And if it’s trendy? Cheap.
Bang out as many Friday night dates as you can while it’s trendy, then drop it at Goodwill without remorse. This is where it gets subjective I think. Every day, everyman type clothes like polos, chinos, casual button-ups, etc.
These are definitely hit or miss when it comes to pricing. Sure that $65 polo is probably constructed better than the $15 shirt. But is it three times better?
Will it actually last you three times longer? More importantly, will you even care about the quality after you’ve been sprinting around the park chasing your toddler? A few years ago I actually did an experiment and bought myself similar shirts at various price points.
I wore them all and recorded how they held up against frequent washing, hanging kids, football practise, etc. Some of the cheaper shirts lasted longer than shirts I spent way more money on! It turns out that some “high-quality” materials don’t take very well to being tossed in the washing machine with your kid’s heck-knows-what stained jerseys.
If you don’t have kids that’s great, you get to enjoy the benefits of that pricey clothing! But once you’ve got your hands full with children laundry seems to be the one constant in how we get our clothes clean. Pros to the higher price tag clothes is that they will sometimes age better, even if they don’t necessarily last longer.
A $40 pair of chinos may fade and soften over time creating a look you didn’t intentionally pay for, while that $15 pair of trousers just looks worn out and cheap. If your into that, then spending the extra bucks might be worth it to you. If you’re just trying to not look like a schlub at the grocery store then I’d stick to the cheaper stuff.
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Also, ever notice how the cheaper retailers can really kill you with the basics but as soon as they start getting cute with fits and details things start to look… cheap? Off. Measurements aren’t lined up quite right.
Pocket placement is funky. Buttons aren’t sewn on properly. Collars don’t lay right.
I have an overly priced shirt that isn’t made with magical material, but it fits my shoulders correctly and doesn’t make me look like I’m wearing a tent. That right there is worth the extra cash to me. Think about how likely it is that your clothes will get destroyed in the purchase process.
Buying something for the zoo with the kids? Super cheap because there’s a strong chance we’re coming home with some type of mystery stain. Buying a shirt for work or a night out with Lauren?
Now you’re talking because there will be no puddles of apple juice or playground mulch to discolor my clothes. Cost per wear is something else I like to factor in as well. That $50 button up that I wear once a week for weekly meetings?
If it lasts me two years then I only spent cents on each wear. That $15 shirt that started to look worn after six months of being in heavy rotation actually costs me more money over time. Although this math gets thrown out the window when taking the Sophie destruction factor into consideration.
Sometimes buying the cheaper version wins because you’re not going to cry when it’s destroyed. Speaking ofDestroyed by Sophie, sometimes I find that mid-range priced clothes are the worst. Like why do those mid-line brands think popping $40-60 dollars on a shirt is a good idea?
It’s not cheap enough that you don’t care when it gets destroyed. And it’s not well made enough that it’ll outlive your children. You end up simply overpaying for slightly nicer store layouts and cloth hangers.
After years of shopping I also started caring about where my clothes were sourced from. That $15 shirt is probably going to make me ask more questions about how it was made versus that $50 shirt. Maybe.
I say that because it’s really hard to know for sure where your stuff is coming from these days. And honestly, I’m not even sure that the expensive shirts are being made in pristine conditions either. That’s when I usually give up and try to purchase less clothing.
Sometimes I’ll pay more for something because it just makes me feel better. Like this jumper I own (that was definitely over $100) that I wear every winter because it makes me feel like I have my life together. Do I really need to spend that much on a jumper to feel that way?
Should you? Depends on your budget and how you feel about yourself I guess. But some days those are the little things that make you feel like a real adult, especially when parenting makes you feel like you’ve got your shirt on backwards.
As you can probably guess by now I told Mike to wear both of those shirts and see how they feel after three months. Wear the Target shirt on playground days, weekends running errands, or any occasion that will likely involve his children making messes. Wear the “nice” shirt when you have to dress up for work or if you and Lauren plan on going out and leaving the kids with the babysitter.
It’s not about how the shirts look when you try them on, it’s about how they look three months from now when they’ve been through the wash dozens of times. Moral of the story? There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question.
It all depends on how much money you’re willing to spend or how particular you are about certain things. I have dads that I know swear by Name Brand basics, and I have dads that only wear clothes from Marshall’s and look awesome. Do what works for you and your lifestyle.
If you know you’ll get a ton of wear out of that $100 shirt then by all means spend away!
Don’t get suckered into thinking that expensive automatically means better-made, but don’t be fooled into thinking that because something costs ten dollars it’s the best deal. Sometimes that $10 shirt will autumn apart after five washes and sometimes that $200 blazer will really do wonders for your confidence.
Trust your fingers. Feel the fabric, double cheque the stitching, and visualize how often you’ll wear it and how brutal kids will be on it. P.S.
If anyone judges you for buying clothes from Target tell them that some of the fanciest dads I know wear a mix of high and low priced clothing all while laughing at people who “care” about where their clothes are from. Style has nothing to do with price and everything to do with knowing what works for you and your family. Although I will say that bedding is one area where I truly do think you get what you pay for.
Good sheets are worth every penny. Parenting is hard enough. At least give yourself some restful sleep at night.
