Ask a man to describe his job, and chances are “telling men what to wear” won’t be at the top of their list. It’s not usually how we brag about our profession. But when you break down what we do – dispensing style advice, reviewing clothes, evaluating trends – it’s basically our job to tell men what to wear.
At The Advisor, that job description has led to me writing approximately 400,000 words on men’s style. Want to know the right length for socks? We’ve got you covered.
Trousers that are too big? Yep, we’ve told you about that too.
How many buttons should you leave undone on a dress shirt?
Two, mostly. But it depends… But before today, I’d never actually asked a woman about it. Not properly, at least.
I’ve interviewed plenty of female celebrities on the topic, and I’ve had many a conversation with girlfriends and female coworkers about menswear. Most of these exchanges happened after a few glasses of wine, me lamenting yet another blowhole espadrille revival and them tolerating my droning self enthusiastically. Point is, I’ve made hundreds of thousands of words of carefully reasoned arguments about men’s style based on discussing it mainly with other men.
When I asked for more female perspective by inviting women on the The Advisor team to contribute their thoughts on the topic, I did so without actually asking real women what they think. So I changed that. Credit where it’s due: I conducted this highly scientific research because my editor called me out for making broad claims about “what women want” in my last menswear article.
But I stand by those edits – after soliciting thoughtful responses from over 200 women from various corners of the UK, I have learned a lot about how British women really feel about men’s style. Methodology: I made a Google Form and sent it to every woman I knew, asking them to fill it out and pass it on to their female friends and family. I offered respondents complete anonymity in exchange for brutal honesty about the British male wardrobe.
The response was… enormous. In all, 219 women ranging in age from 21 to 68 from across the UK submitted answers to my questions. Several wrote impressively fiery supplementary comments, and one woman in Italy felt so strongly about men’s shoes that she sent me a separate 600-word essay on the subject.
Her carefully-researched arguments about weighted-mean toe boxes made me rethink every pair of loafers I’ve ever owned. If you follow menswear at all, you’ll know it can be a jingoistic world where regional tastes seem to end at your own hometown. That’s why I asked women all over the UK about male style.
While there were plenty of predictable differences in opinion based on age, location, and generation, many respondents seemed to share similar views on what makes a man’s outfit or wardrobe successful. With that in mind, let’s dive into what women really think about what British men wear… Denim jeans ranking highest of any item of menswear surprises me – but I shouldn’t be. Jeans are tough to get wrong.
If you wear a shirt that’s too big? Oversized is hardly in right now. But put on a pair of baggy jeans and you’ll at least look like you’re trying to emulate Tyler, the Creator on purpose, not because you raided your dad’s closet.
My colleagues thought this question was gonna be a killer – a chance for men to brag about their style-winning tweaks to classic suiting. How many knew that the buttoning rules for vests had changed since 2018? ! Well, not really.
The respondents who had negative things to say about suits were actually more vociferous in their hatred. Half of women said they didn’t care whether a man wore a suit and another 31% said they found suits boring or try-hard if there wasn’t a clear reason to wear one. “I don’t need men wearing suits all of the time like some kind of sexist utopia where everyone knows their place,” reads one respondent’s vivacious answer. “A suit just makes you look like you’ve got something to hide.” Oh, whoopsie. Trust me, I wanted this question to validate years of telling men that rocking a suit is basically nympho napalm when it comes to women.
Alas, it did not. Instead, the results paint a startlingly different picture of the suit’s place in modern women’s minds. Older women seem to have far more positive associations with suits and new generations are turning against them.
“They spend all this time making sure their clothes fit perfectly but half of them can’t even dress themselves properly,” wrote one 26-year-old woman from Manchester. Female Gen Z: Doing it to me. There are fewer bonafide menswear villains than groceries being able to tweet, but these shoes are on that short list.
About this question I preface: As someone who’s written about “designer” trainers on multiple occasions for various outlets, I braced myself for brutal female commentary. Sure enough, although hardly the majority opinion, these soul-sucking shapeless atrocities earned more hatred than any other men’s garment in the survey. Loafers came in a close second.
Aside from some truly horrifying footwear choices, I learned a lot about women’s preferences when it came to specifics. But I was most interested in how women felt about men taking care in their appearance itself. You’ve likely seen articles claiming that women love when men dress like they “effortlessly stumbled out of bed wearing cool clothes.” Fitsignal content if I’ve ever seen it.
Boy howdy, were those articles wrong. The majority of women said they love it when a guy puts thought into his outfit, with only a small percentage preferring men who strive for that “low effort” look. Women are not into dudes who don’t care about what they’re wearing.
They really don’t. Many interviewees specifically said that while anyone can look good in a new suit or nice dress shirt, someone who cares about their style will look great no matter what they’re wearing. “I have nothing against men dressing well, but why should I care if you couldn’t be bothered?” reads one gem of a response. As someone who has tried to encourage men to care more about how they dress for 15 years, that comment is music to my ears.
As I read through responses on this question, I was struck by how women kept mentioning personal style. Having a consistent aesthetic that speaks to who you are as a person came up over and over again as something that draws women to certain men’s style choices. “It makes me think he has the confidence to be himself,” said one respondent. “You can’t put a price on having your own style,” said another. When I started writing about menswear in 2007, “having style” was the end-all be-all of how we talked about men’s clothing.
Lately I’ve stressed less about whether a man is trendy and more about whether he understands fit, proportions, and craftsmanship. But as far as how women view us go, it sounds like personal style reigns supreme. I don’t have room in this article to list all 16 items women said they find attractive on men, but I will say that the results were fascinating and instructive.
From wearing nicely-fitted clothes that fit their bodies to getting creative with colour, certain trends popped up again and again in women’s responses. Here are my top takeaways on the items women find attractive on men: Male arms = female cleavage. Every woman responded positively to rolled-up shirts that expose the arms.
If you’re reading this and putting together your shopping list for cuffing season, buy some short-sleeve button ups and consider your mission ex-fucking-pleted. Fit > Brand. Unlike previous questions in this survey, certain items women found attractive on men were mentioned overwhelmingly more than any other. “Clothes that fit his body” was at the top of that list.
Toss out the baggy clothes and work on that gauge, dudes. Show off your hobbies. Women like learning about men through their clothing, whether it’s their favourite band tee or niche athletic shirt.
Have an interest? Wear it on your sleeve – literally. Hopefully you’ve gleaned some insight from reading through all these responses.
If not, allow me to summarise: Don’t be sloppy, dress for your body, and have some fun with your wardrobe. Simple, right? I saved this question for last because I expected it to be easy.
Men care about fashion. They look in the mirror and think about what they’re wearing. We scrutinize our guts in trousers, cheque for backpack butt, and patch holes in our favourite jeans.
Yet time and again women told me how oblivious men are to themselves as they wander about their day clothing-related crimes we don’t know they commit. ”Men don’t realise how tight they look,” writes one respondent. “Baggy jeans aren’t baggy on you, they’re your mum’s curtains.” ”They’re too busy looking at themselves in the mirror thinking they look good,” reads another. I asked this question looking for silly answers. Instead I found a treasure trove of introspection on how little we know ourselves when it comes to our dress sense.
The lesson many men can benefit from? Try looking in a mirror once in a while.
Who knows, you might like what you see.
The replies I got to that last question opened my eyes to just how little men understand women’s perceptions of their style. I’ve got very good at explaining why something is right or wrong in a man’s wardrobe. But the “why” has eluded me for years.
Have I been explaining myself to men clearly? Probably. Have they listened?
Not as much as we think they do. So take these answers with my grain of salt. Correlate them with the advice you read here at The Advisor and elsewhere.
But if you want to dress well in a way that gets women noticing and keeps them interested, ask them what they think first. Trust me, they’ve been wanting you to do that since 2003.
