Last summer I attended seven weddings, including both ends of the countryside-versus-city-State divided Nigel. It’s left me suitably qualified (read: drunk) to offer some tips for navigating weddings when Britain’s vast wedding landscape splits quite so cleanly down the middle. The village vs. urban metropolitan divide Country weddings.
They’re a wonderful thing. For one afternoon you’re a High Society aristocrat dining al fresco on pheasant and bubbles. The next minute you’re wrestling with your khakis and sensible shoes in a muddy field trying not to ruin your suit when someone releases those bloody doves.
Because rural Britain loves a dairy-lovered stately pile just as much as it loves the nearest Shepherd Neame farmhouse with about five acres of grazing grass, it should come as no surprise that weddings held in these environments have their own set of rules. Consider yourself now duly informed.
Suit wise things are pretty straightforward.
A wool suit in a decent weight is non-negotiable. Navy is almost always right, as is a heavier grey. Bonus points if said suit has some understated texture – flannel if it’s cold, hopsack or a similar breathable but heavier-weight weave if it isn’t.
I like to have one particularly tweedy number that I break out every autumn; a bottle green herringbone that’s proven itself time and time again against roughly ploughed soils and glass of sparkly things. Brogues are your friend. A pair with a grippy Dainite sole in brown that won’t show off stains as easily as black is ideal.
Get yourself a nice sturdy pair that can handle being thrown in a suitcase feet first at a moment’s notice and you’re laughing. Patent shoes are not your friend at a rural wedding. I once saw a man wear patent Oxfords to a wedding in the middle of nowhere and spend twenty minutes trying not to slip over on cowpat after cowpat.
Because everything else will be quite restrained, feel free to tip your hat slightly more in favour of fashion with your tie and pocket square. I own a burgundy silk knit tie with a flat underside that I struggle to wear in London but have been miraculously praised for time and time again at weddings in the country. Again, no idea why.
Just works. Oh, and maybe pack a pocket square that can be used as a makeshift hand towel. I’ve dried off tears, cleaned glasses and… well you get the idea.
Urban weddings on the other hand. Ah urban weddings. Whilst city ceremonies often pride themselves on flouting tradition they do ironically have one rule: you will stand out if you wear a tweed blazer.
O ur capital is particularly prone to these sartorial minefields – guaranteed somewhere, whether it’s Shoreditch or Chelsea, has turned their wedding invite into some sort of Wes Anderson fever dream. Thankfully rural rules do not apply here. Darker suits are your friend.
As mentioned earlier, a sharp navy will never let you down but a good black or charcoal suit can work wonders in an urban environment. Slimmer cuts with less structure also tend to go down well – Italian or British is fine depending on who you’re dressing to impress. My go-to urban wedding jacket is this midnight blue number that I bought from J Crew some years back.
Super slim but not skinny, with almost no structure it falls somewhere between an Italian and British cut.
Cost me an entire month’s rent but has easily been worth it across multiple weddings, job interviews, and that time I was caught dressing as someone important at a film premiere (long story, free champagne). Footwear wise loafers and minimalist trainers are growing in popularity at the chicer London ceremonies I’ve been to lately, however I’d still advise leaving the trainers for the evening reception (if you’re confident in the couple’s guest dress code choices).
A clean, pared-back Oxford shoe or Chelsea boot will suffice nicely. Again, because your suit will likely be fairly simple a quirky tie and pocket square combo can work wonders. Having said that, keep it polished and sharp – urban weddings often have better lighting than their rural equivalents so get that ‘@sOfficial’ instagram gallery to pop.
Lastly, and I feel this is something a lot of guys forget about when dressing for weddings; how you carry yourself will depend on where you’re getting married. For country weddings, relax. Everyone does.
Literally everyone’s jackets come off at some point after dinner and nobody cares about the tie being done up. City weddings will often feel more formal for longer into the night. Best, casual enjoyed ones at both ends of the spectrum.
Learn from my mistakes.
